My sweet boy.
You turned 6 months old today. 6 months! We mums get fixated on age like this. Just ignore it. It’s partly because you are the fiercest representation we have of the passing of time. It makes us feel a little panicky. Mostly, though, it’s because we don’t want you to grow up and leave us. Isn’t that the plain truth?
Because you see, the happiest of days are right here. Now. With you. And any mother who appears happy to have their child traipsing around everywhere, big and independent and onto greater, larger things just OUT THERE IN THE WORLD is really just a fantastic liar. We love a little too much, a little too hard and a little too deep, I’m afraid. But it’s simply our job, so you’re just going to have to go with it.
Billy, do you know something? I wanted you for so long. I wanted you for months and months and months before your daddy agreed that the time was right. And then I waited months and months to fall pregnant. And then when we found out I was, I jumped up and down like a crazy person, hugging your dad and grabbing your sister and twirling her around and around and around. And then I waited 9 so very long months to finally have you in my arms, with a pretty gruelling 14 hours at the very last end.
And sweetheart, do you know something else?
You were worth every second of that wait.
Every long second of the year and a half that passed.
Because having you in my life has made it complete in a way I could never explain, and because I love you so much it hurts.
You are the easiest, most laid-back baby I have ever come across. And your smile. Oh sweet Lord, your smile. You NEVER STOP SMILING. Even the old ladies at Woolworths pull a fast one on you and get you grinning in about two seconds flat. Which of course makes them gush and blush and turn to mush.
At 6 months of age, you are now eating food. Pumpkin and banana are your favourite. Avocado not so much. You can sit up on your own, though we have to prop you up a bit with some cushions otherwise you face plant your way to the ground. You don’t like to be left alone much. You like to just sit and watch us, taking the noise and music and chaos all in. You have two little stubs of teeth sprouting from your bottom gum, and your hair has a great tinge of red to it when we go into the sun. Our chickens absolutely love you and wherever you are in our backyard, they come flocking. You have a really goofy laugh. The way you look at your sister just about slays me. Whenever she comes into the room, you strain your head to find where she is. You have your own secret bond forming, your own shared laughter, your own special language, and as Ella sits besides you day after day pulling faces at you and giving you raspberries and tickling you and trying every trick she knows to make you smile, make you laugh, I can’t help but think that giving you one another is the best thing I have ever done.
You’ve joined our family like a missing piece, so much so that I can’t remember how things used to be without you. You have my whole heart, sweet boy, for all of my days, and I’m so grateful to share in this story that’s becoming your life.
And I’m so glad that I’m the lucky woman who gets to be your mama.